How big is your God?

(A continuation of learning to give Our burdens to God)

I read a book today. (Yeah, that in and of itself is something to get excited about because it wasn’t required reading!) I read Max Lucado’s book Traveling Light.  As I was reading I was struck with how I don’t see God as big as he really is. It’s not that I’ve put a limit on God, it’s just that it is hard to comprehend the greatness and power of God. As I started thinking about this, I realized that I wanted to have a bigger view of God. 

How do you view God? Is he someone that takes naps or goes on long vacations? Or is he like Santa Clause who comes and drops a pile of gifts once a year? Maybe you think that you can only ask him for things when you are desperate and life seems to be ending. Is this you? Do you view God as the all powerful, loving, caring, providing, and protective shepherd that he is? Do you even think of him as a shepherd?

Now what about the burdens in your life? We all have them. Maybe it’s looming school deadlines, grades, family situations, relationships, your job, finances, your health, etc. We have so many things we think and about worry about every day but we forget that we have a God who cares about each and every little part of our lives, each thought, and each of the challenges—big or small—that we face each day. Our God doesn’t sit around waiting for something really big and bad to happen, he doesn’t take naps, and he doesn’t just come around on Christmas like Santa Clause does. Our God is an all knowing, caring, loving, just God who cares for us like a shepherd does for his flock of sheep. In fact, he is our shepherd. 

I like to think of myself as a very independent person. I am proud of the fact that I can take care of the day to day happenings in my life and I am not totally reliant on anyone else to survive. (Don’t get me wrong, I do still really appreciate help and people coming alongside me to encourage me and support me.) Although to most people it seems that I have my life together on the outside, the truth is that I have struggles and burdens and wants and cares. These are the things that I don’t let many people see, instead,  I take them to God. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t cry out to God for guidance and direction. Maybe it’s just that I’m fretting about a test or thinking about the bills I have to pay, but sometimes it bigger like worrying about my family, trying to build stronger relationships, or knowing how to help a struggle friend. These are the things that I take to God. After all, he is the provider of all my needs, my wonderful counselor, my great physician, my protector, and the light to my path. When life is rough and I encounter difficulties I remember this, but sometimes when life is on a roll and everything seems to be going well I forget that God still cares about the little things. He cares about the fact that my computer died, he cares about the fact that I’m overwhelmed with the length of my To Do list, and he cares about me being able to spend time with a friend. My dear friends, HE CARES!!! Our great shepherd tells us to “cast all your cares on him for he careth for you.” He doesn’t say “cast you big cares” or cast the life threatening cares,” He says “cast ALL your cares.” That includes the ones that we hardly think are cares. All those cares, or burdens, weigh us down so why do we carry them? 

Several years ago my family hiked the Chilkute trail from Skagway, Alaska to Lake Bennett, British Columbia. It is the 36 mile trail that the gold minors took during the Alaska Gold rush. When we hiked this train we had to carry with us everything, with the exception of water, that we would need for the five days we would be hiking. When you think about food for nine people for five days that is a lot t of food. Like a LOT of food. Even when it is dehydrated it is still a lot of food. I should not forget that you need something to eat out of, something to cook in, and a stove to cook with. Then you need a place to sleep...nine people means three tents and nobody likes sleeping on really hard ground so you need nine sleeping mats and then nine sleeping bags to sleep in. Keep in mind this is Alaska we are talking about, this means that the weather is unprecedented. You have to prepared for sun, rain, wind, really cold temperatures, and warn temperatures. We all needed regular cloths, and a change of cloths incase those got wet, rain cloths, a warm coat, hats, gloves, extra socks, etc. I think you get the picture...it’s a lot of stuff even when you take the bare minimum. And yes, we hauled all that stuff for five days over a thirty-six mike trail. What if we hadn’t needed to carry all that stuff? What if we just had a bottle of water and the cloths on our backs? We could have made that trip so much faster. Instead of walking for five whole days, we could have made it in probably two and a half or three, but we couldn’t just go on a hike like that without taking the necessary supplies. 

We walk through life caring all kinds of burdens, but wouldn’t it be so much easier if we gave those all to God and let him carry them? He wants to carry them for us, He is just waiting for you to give them to Him. Imagine this, your house is a mess and you have no time to clean it because you have other more pressing things to do. Someone offers to come clean it for you and all you have to do is tell them where you keep your cleaners and rags. Are you gong to say “nah, I’ll do it eventually,” or are you going to say “they are under the bathroom sink!” It’s a no-brainer! God is doing the same thing. He is asking you “my dear child, let me carry the worry you have about you family, and the distress you have over a relationship or the way your boss is treating you.” He is offering to carry it for us, all we have to do is give it to Him. But we, the stupid, helpless, dumb, and sheep, say “oh no, I got this. I’m stressing out big time and my life is falling apart, but oh no, I’ve got this.” Seriously? You are going to keep hauling those burdens around when you have every chance to give them up and let someone else carry them? Wow, we are dumb. What is wrong with us?

We are prideful. We think we can hold it together and take care of things ourselves, but truth be told, we can’t. We need God. We need the all powerful, loving, caring father. Be honest with yourself, you can’t go through this life alone. Think about this question though, do you treat your God like he is as big as he really is? Or do you put God in a box? Do you take all your cares no matter how big or small to him and fully trust that he will carry your burdens? It is so easy to say “I have given that burden to God,” but have you really? Have you given it to him 100%, or are you still hanging on by just a thread in case he doesn’t actually pick it up? I’m guilty of it. I know there are things in my life that I have given partially to God but am still holding onto that one little thing. God will do great things when we give him our burdens and don’t take them back, not even the smallest part of them. 

I want to invite you on a journey. A journey of learning to give it all to God and discovering how big our God really is. Who will join me? Will you? My dear friend, don’t carry your burdens any longer. God is standing there, waiting, just waiting to take them for you and carry them for you. Drop them at his feet and stand tall so you can live the life God intended you to. Not the life that is diminished by the burdens we carry, but the life that is free from those burdens because you have given to your loving Shepherd. 

Join me in discovering how big a God we serve!

With love,

Your sister in Christ

"Casting All Your Cares Upon Him, For He Careth For You"

Wow! What an incredible summer! The last time I was over in this corner of the world I was trying to decide if I would be working on a fishing boat somewhere in Alaska, or doing some other crazy thing. It's interesting to look back and see all that God has done in my life and how he sets things up in just the right way so that at the perfect time things will happen. Its almost like a chemistry experiment...if you don't measure things carefully, give it time to react, or skip a little step, it won't work out. Thankfully with God there is always a perfect set-up and when we look back we just say "WOW! That was a God thing!" This was my summer.

Back in February or so, a lady came into one of my big lecture classes and briefly told us about an internship opportunity where we could make money, learn a bunch of really good skills, and make connections that would help our future careers. At this time I had no idea what I was going to do this summer so I put my name and contact info on a slip of paper and totally forgot about it. Come the last part of April I got a phone call late one night from a that same gal, asking is I was interested in coming to an information meeting the next day to learn more about the internship. I had a busy schedule last semester (still not as busy as this semester), and the only way I could make it was to skip part of class. I NEVER skip class unless I am sick.

I went to the meeting and learned more about the program. Southwestern Advantage is a company that has college students intern with them all over the country selling in-home educational tools door-to-door. Sounds crazy right? Well, when I saw some of the products the offered I recognized them as something I had used to help prepare to taking the SAT and ACT while I was in high school. The rest of a long story short...After three interviews, I was selected to be part of a team of interns from my school and I started working to learn what I needed to know going into our week of training in Nashville.

The day after finals ended we packed up and drove across the country to Nashville, spent a week in sales school, and then went off to work in Kentucky for the summer. I worked all summer averaging about 85 hours a week and learned a ton about people, running a business, working hard, and myself, all while meeting thousands of really awesome people, making new friends, and building friendships with other hardworking students.

Looking back on the summer I see the countless ways that God worked to teach me and grow me to be more like the woman he wants me to be. It wasn't always easy. Knocking on strangers doors isn't the easiest thing you can do with your summer, but it will push you into extreme personal growth. Not only did I grow in who I am as a person, but I also grew spiritually and as a child of God. When you are working alone all day every day you have to have something to hold onto. Something constant that you can go to when you feel down, defeated, or like giving up. I had to rely on God.

Here is real question, when things get tough, who do you turn to? Do you turn to your all loving Father in Heaven, or do you turn to things of the world? The world tries to solve our problems by handing us things to cover them up. We think that if we do more we will not have time to think about our problems and they will suddenly disappear. If we feel unaccepted we, at least women, tend to try and change the way we look, what we wear, how much we weigh, etc. Other times people start turning to things like drugs and alcohol that cause them to forget their struggles. Here is the truth though, these things don't solve our problems, they just temporarily cover them up while behind whatever cover we have, they are growing and festering. Its like covering up a wound in hopes that it will just get better, but we all know that that is not what happens. We cover it up, but it is still there, getting worse day by day. We forget to turn to God with our struggles no matter how big or small they may be. He is the only one who can give us help and complete healing.

In all those days this summer that I was alone, hot, tiered, feeling like I couldn't do my job well, like giving up, struggling with rejection, and wondering if all the work was really worth it, I had to turn to God. There was nothing else and no one else to go to. This grew my faith and reliance on God. When I was discouraged I went to him for encouragement. When I was rejected I prayed that I would be a blessing to someone. When I wondered if it was worth it I reminded myself of how God had put this opportunity in my life. When there is nothing else to turn except God we begin to realize how loving, caring, kind, and gentle He is. So why do we wait to turn to God until other things have failed us?

Pride. It is the root of all evil. Pride is what keeps us from going to God and asking for help. Pride is what makes our lives so much harder than they need to be. We are told "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you." (Matthew 7:7) God is our refuge and our strength, a very present help in time of trouble. (Psalm 46:1) Why then do we not go to God first? 

It isn't easy to humble ourselves and admit that we can't do things on our own. We are prideful beings. However, as soon as we are willing to humble ourselves before God and admit that we need his help, He will help us. God sent his only son to die for us so we could live with him eternally. If God is willing to give his only son, why wouldn't he be willing to help us through our day to day struggles? He is always there, we just forget to ask.

What are you struggling with today? This week? This month? Have you taken it to your loving Father? Or have you tried to fix things on your own? Don't wait any longer, take these things to God for he cares for you. He loves you with love that we cannot even comprehend, and he wants the very best for you. 

Through my summer I leaned just how important taking my cares to the Lord is. Will you join me in the journey of taking our cares to our loving Father in Heaven?

Lovingly Your Sister in Christ

We Were Made To Be Awesome!

The last few days I have been thinking a lot about what to do. The semester is almost over and summer is getting closer and that mean I need to figure out what I am going to do this summer. I applied for several jobs, but didn't get any of them. I have been praying that God would provide me with a job this summer, but apparently all the jobs I applied for aren't in his plan for my summer. Is it hard to be a college student with hardly any money who doesn't have a job for the summer? Yes it is. It is an exercise in faith and trust waiting for God to provide me with a job, but I am confident He will provide for me. However, I am just sitting around waiting for him to drop something in my lap? No.

I am reading a book by Kevin DeYoung call Just Do Something. It is a book about Gods will and doing something great with our lives. People today seem to get somewhat overwhelmed when trying to discover God's will for their life. I've been there too and it isn't easy. Let me ask you this though, if we aren't sure what God's will is for our life should we just sit around and wait for Him to make it clear to us? I don't think so. I mean, if we did everyone would be sitting around doing nothing! Discerning God's will can be quite difficult, but I want to share what Mr. DeYoung has to say about it and hopefully it will help you understand it better as it did for me.

God has a will of decree. This is what He has ordained. Everything that happens is in accordance to God's will of decree because He is ultimately in control of the whole universe. Secondly God has a will of desire. Following God's will of desire is doing what He commands us to do in the Bible. We need to obey him. Following His will of desire means putting away the old man who was a slave to sin and putting on the new man who is a servant of righteousness. Lastly is God's will of direction, which is what we tend to have so much difficulty discerning. I believe that God does have a specific plan for our lives, but he does not micromanage us. God will direct us in accordance to His will but He might not tell us to "take this job," "move to this place," or "take this college class." While there are times he makes it clear to us we need to do or not do certain things, God is not going to cause our live to suddenly end because we took a job that wasn't the best option for us. God works through the decisions we make to lead us in His plan for our lives. Just because we might make a wrong turn along the way doesn't mean that we will never make it to our destination. God will continue to direct us and lead us to complete the special task he has given us here on earth. While it is important to obey God, we need to stop fretting about making a mistake and doing something that is not part of God's will for our lives. Remember God's will of decree? Yeah, God is still in control of everything that happens.

So why are we sitting around waiting for God to drop something in our lap and be like "Go buy the blue house on 5th street!" This is why I'm not waiting around for God to drop a summer job in my lap. I am applying for different jobs, looking around for opportunities, and staying open to doing anything. I might end up babysitting, teaching violin lessons, and doing other odd jobs, or I might work on a fishing boat this summer. I don't know yet, but I am not just sitting here waiting for a phone call from someone that needs a babysitter for their kids this summer.

If you are unsure about what God wants you to be doing, just find something to do. If you are wondering if God maybe wants you to go into some kind of ministry don't wait until you know for sure, get involved with something near you. Maybe something as simple as helping teach a Sunday school class. God is going to use all the things we do to help teach us and prepare us for what He has in store for our lives.

God has a plan for our lives but we can't accomplish it if we are sitting around. Here is a short video I watched in one of my classes last week. It is lighthearted and funny, but also makes you think deeper about what we are (or are not) doing with our lives.

"YOU WERE MADE TO BE AWESOME!" ~Kid President

What are you waiting for?

GO DO SOMETHING!

"Try" - Colbie Caillat

I head this song recently and it made me think again about how caught up we get in trying to make ourselves something we aren't. We spend loads of time, energy, and money trying to make ourselves look a certain way and be the "ideal girl" who has everything put together and perfect all the time. I did a quick google search and found that the average woman will spend $15,000 on beauty products over the course of her life and another $125,000 on clothing, handbags/purses, shoes, etc. and the current generation is expected to raise that number to as high as $200,000. Congratulations! You could have bought a small house for that much!

We get so sucked up into the mindset that we need to look good that we forget what really matters. Many woman are constantly thinking about what others think of them, and sometime in your life you have probably asked yourself, "do others like me?" Yes it is nice to feel valued and appreciated by others, but is that really your ultimate goal? I think of Matthew 6:19-20 which says, "Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt and thieves break through and steal: but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal." Are you laying up treasures in heaven, or are you focused on the here and now that will one day be taken away and destroyed?

Where is it that you get your self esteem and worth? Do you find it in what others think and say about you? Or do you get it from God? Have you accepted the perfect way God created you? Do you love the way you are? What in your life really matters?

For quite a while I struggled with accepting the way I looked. I didn't feel beautiful and sometimes I even felt that I was ugly. I'm not sure how I got this idea or why I did it, but when I looked in the mirror I began telling myself I was beautiful. Eventually I started believing it and when I saw myself in the mirror I didn't have to tell myself I was beautiful, I saw it! The girl I saw in the mirror was perfect because God had made her just the way he wanted her to be!

I'm not at all saying we shouldn't put effort into making ourselves look nice, in fact, all my sisters (and brothers) could tell you that I love getting new cloths, new shoes, creating new outfits, doing my hair, and wearing makeup. When we do these things we just need to make sure were are doing them for the right reasons. Embrace the way God make you and believe that you are just the way He wanted you to be! We have no need to try and be something we aren't. JUST BE YOU!

Sister, You are Beautiful!

Practical Tips for Helping Families in Medical Crisis

          My sister recently wrote this article based on our family's experiences with medical crises. Whether you have had a family medical crisis or know someone going through one, I am certain it will be an encouragement to you and help you know what you can do to support a family during such a time. 

Practical Tips for Helping Families in Medical Crisis

By Amelia Gilliland, RN

With Mrs. Catherine Gilliland, and Claire, Mariya, Grace, and Carolyn Gilliland

            An accident. A cancer diagnosis. A terminal illness. A miscarriage or child born prematurely. It pains our hearts to see our friends, neighbors, and church family hurting from medical crises. We want to help lift their burdens, but it can be difficult to know how best to help. Sometimes it is difficult to find ways to help because we don’t really understand what they are going through or we don’t know what the person or family needs. Sometimes we might even wonder if our efforts to help are truly helpful. Though each crisis and each family’s experience is different, there are many things you can do to help these hurting people regardless of the specifics of their situation. Through my own family’s experiences with medical crises and my nursing training, I would like to share with you some thoughts and practical ideas to empower you to effectively meet the needs of those in medical crisis around you.

Offer specific ways you can help

            Being willing to help in any way needed is wonderful, but offer specific ways you can, or would like, to help. Navigating a medical crisis is overwhelming and lots of “I would be happy to help in any way you need – just let me know” offers can actually add to the overwhelming feelings. It adds to the information that has to be sorted out and decisions that have to be made. Sometimes it is just beyond someone in crisis to decide who-to-ask-help-from-for-what. Sometimes it hard to simply find the time to even make the call for help. And, sometimes pride gets in the way of asking for help – even if it has already been offered and even when a person is getting desperate! So, decide what you would like to do to help and then make a specific offer. Making specific offers for what you know you have the resources and time to help with will also protect you from having to say “no” if you were to be asked to help with something you are not able to help with.

Here are some specific ideas:

~ Meals (hot and ready to eat, freezer meals, or meals for family members staying with the ill person at the hospital)

~ House cleaning

~ Laundry/ironing

~ Yard care

~ Garden/farm care

~ Driving (taking children to and from school or other extracurricular activities, taking older children to the store for grocery shopping, giving rides to and from doctor appointments, etc.)

~ Home and automobile maintenance and repairs

~ Child care

~ Coordinate help from others for the family

Even if a family is capable of managing such tasks on their own despite a crisis, the practical help can still be such a blessing. It offers moral support and helps them see in tangible ways that they are not alone.

Provide childcare

            Offering to care for young children on a regular basis can be immensely helpful for the entire family. Not only does it offer a reprieve for the parents or older children caring for the little ones, it can also help the younger ones as well.  Being able to spend time away from the craziness of their usually calm and secure world-turned-upside-down can give a sense of security, helping the little ones cope with the stress of the medical crisis. It can be very upsetting even for very young children to see their family member so ill, so time away where the crisis isn’t staring them in the face all the time can help relieve some of their stress. Making this a regular short-term occurrence (one afternoon a week) or intermittent long-term event (keeping the children for a full weekend or week) will help add predictability to the child’s life and will help the child feel more in control because they know what to expect. Structured activities, a predictable schedule, and incorporating the children into normal household chores and routines can add to the benefit of time spent away from home. Some children feel a need to be closer to their parents, so shorter times away may be better, while children a little older and with a little more independence may do better with longer stays away from home.

            It is not uncommon for young children to demonstrate regression during periods of extreme stress. This means they may temporarily to go back to less mature stages of normal child growth and development. This can include behavior issues like acting out or separation anxiety, but it can also have physical manifestations. For example, a potty-trained child may start having accidents again.  Being cognizant of this will help you be able to respond in an understanding and positive way. A supportive, caring, and structured environment will be particularly beneficial to these children.

Encourage the family members to take time for self-care

            Self-care is critically important when dealing with the stress of a medical crisis. Without self-care those caring for the ill family member or other younger family members will eventually be worn down emotionally and/or physically and will be unable to care for others. Self-care is not selfishness – it is empowering because it gives the recharge needed to keep going. We are humans with limitations. Even Jesus hid himself from the very needy throngs of people so He could have time alone with His Father. That is self-care – taking time to do something restful or refreshing for you.

Encourage the older family members who are busy caring for the sick and younger children to take time for themselves: a walk alone, an evening with a relaxing bath, a quite hour with a good book or movie, a craft project, etc. Taking time for “unnecessary” things like this can seem impossible. We even make ourselves feel guilty for taking time to care for ourselves. There does not need to be any guilt in it. It is a good and necessary thing. So encourage self-care, keep them accountable for it when appropriate, and when possible facilitate it by helping with child-care and other day-to-day necessities.

Share words of encouragement

            Get well cards and written notes of encouragement to not only the ill person, but also to the family members, mean so very much! It would be hard to over-do this – sending one every week or two is not too much. Consider making the note writing a family project and put together a package of encouraging cards, one to be opened daily or weekly for however long you choose. Including Scriptures can be particularly encouraging. You can even send a note even if you don’t know the person very well – it could me the world to them.

            Phone calls can also be a wonderful encouragement – again, not only for the ill person, but also just as importantly for the family members. Just letting them know you are thinking about them can be huge and this can open up opportunities for the person to talk. You might tell someone they can call anytime if they “just need to talk”. That is wonderful, but sometimes it can be hard to pick up the phone and call someone “just to talk” even if they know they need it. So call, check-in, and then if they are ready to talk they will open up.

            When the relationship and situation allows, be direct in asking how the family member is doing – not to pry, but to give them an opportunity to share how they really are doing. If (or when) they cry, there is no need to feel bad. You didn't make them cry. They needed to cry, they needed to share, and you have just given them that opportunity to be real and open – even just with themselves – about how they really are doing. There is healing in tears and being real. Listen, hug them, let them know you are praying for them, but please, please, don't try to fix their problems!

            Now having said all this, show care and concern for their situation, but try not to let it dominate or define every conversation. Sometimes it can get old to always have people asking how your ill family member is doing. Not because the care isn’t appreciated, but because repeating the same thing and answering the same questions over and over again is tough, especially if there are no answers to the questions about the diagnosis, prognosis, testing, treatment plan, etc.! It is hard to answer a quick “How is he/she doing?” with just a one or two word answer.  The answer is really not as simple as “good” or “bad”!  If you are looking for an update on how the ill individual is doing, consider looking to their church’s prayer requests/updates or a patient care site/blog if available.

A couple things NOT to say

            When you are looking to encourage someone, there are a couple things that should not be said. Number one, “I know what you are going through.” This is a common statement. People say it with good motives and want to convey empathy, but unless you really have experienced the same thing, don’t say or suggest that you know what it is like. It can really hurt. Instead, relate to the person by identifying feelings. “That must be very overwhelming” or “I would feel _______ if I were in your shoes right now.” This can be comforting because it shows you are trying to understand what they are going through. Identifying feelings also helps the hurting person recognize their feelings and it gives them permission to experience those feelings. Number two, “Everything will be okay.” Again, this is said to encourage, but you do not know that everything will be okay. Perhaps you don’t know the whole story. Maybe the family isn’t ready to share everything yet. Offer compassion and encouraging words, but don't offer false hope.

           

Give

            If you are able, consider giving financially. Medical crises are costly whether due to medical expenses or loss of income when the breadwinner is ill or the caregiver is unable to work. A financial gift may seem impersonal but can be a huge blessing and relieve a great deal of financial stress. If you prefer to give in kind, consider giving groceries, paying for an automobile repair, or paying for some other type of expense.

             

The crisis isn’t over when the diagnosis is gone

            There is great rejoicing when a person is declared cancer-free or discharged home from the hospital, but the crisis isn’t over when the diagnosis is gone. As upside-down as a family’s world turns when they receive a cancer (or other life-altering) diagnosis, there is sometimes more predictability during treatment than after treatment is finished. During treatment there is an algorithm for which treatment comes first, how long it lasts, expected side effects, then the next treatment modality expected based on the outcome of the first. After a person is diagnosis-free, the algorithm is gone and can leave a family feeling in no-man’s land. Their loved one is “well” but not really well at the same time - and there is no prescribed way to get well! It can take many months for the ill person be regain their strength, return to normal activities, and be able to resume their previous responsibilities. Sometimes the family will be able to return to their “old normal” and other times they will reach a “new normal”. Regardless, this process takes time and can be difficult and frustrating. As the family needs less and less practical help, continue praying and providing emotional support.

A special note for families in medical crisis

            As difficult as cancer and other life-altering illnesses are to understand for adults, it is even more difficult for children. Whether it is a child who is severely ill or a family member, Child Life Specialists can help children understand, at an age appropriate level, what is going on. They have special training and resources that can be used to guide and help children process the crisis and medical treatments. Contact your local cancer treatment center or doctor to find a Child Life Specialist who can help you.

 

            If you are really struggling with a life-altering illness, illness of a family member, or the aftermath of a medical crisis, consider seeking professional counseling. It may be easy to think of counseling as something for those who are “weak” or “incapable” of coping on their own. This is not the case!  Like a personal trainer, a counselor is a one-on-on coach – someone who can coach you mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.  It takes courage to seek help, but it shows that you want and are willing to grow and learn from the difficult situation. Getting help does not mean you are weak, it means you want to become stronger. You may find a counselor in your local phone book or you can request a referral to a counselor from your pastor or family doctor.

            I write this with heartfelt appreciation to the countless people who have carried my family and me through more than one major medical crisis. For the countless meals, the sweet notes from distant friends, the young men who cared for our yard, for groceries and more meals, for the families who provided a safe and calm haven for my little sisters as our parents were so very ill, for the many men who maintained our automobiles and helped with home repairs, for my friends who looked me squarely in the eye and asked me how I was doing – how I was coping – and then were not scared away when I burst into tears… and for so very, very much more. In writing this I have relived some of the best, worst, and bittersweet moments of these crises, and I am beginning to see an answer to prayer – that these painful experiences would not go to waste. These experiences have helped me know better how to come along side hurting people and help them in a truly helpful way, and I hope in sharing this that you too will be empowered to minister more effectively to families in medical crisis.